Just realized this Sunday’s edition of Feed Hell is somewhat sex-heavy, which I want everyone to know is not an insight into my current mental state.

• Sex on the brain:  Spontaneous orgasms and “hypoactive sexual desire disorders” might be linked to temporal lobe epilepsy or brain tumors. Like the woman who had orgasms while she brushed her teeth. All that in…out…in…out…
• On your knees: Good Catholic couples are now supposed to say a prayer before having sex to prevent it from being about “hedonism.” So that the nasty won’t be so nasty? FAIL.
• A Christmas Plea: All you old-fashioned folks like me who still shop in brick-and-mortar stores: give the gift that keeps on giving and do not do anything on this list.  I can tell you from experience that your shop “associate” will cling to the memory of your restraint as proof that common decency still exists in the world.
• Will write for shoes:  Specifically those from Christian Louboutin.
• Mask-era:  Maybelline has a new vibrating mascara.  Now really. I ask you. Who are we kidding? Are we all still so shy about pleasuring our own parts that we still need to camouflage our sex toys?
• Heroine kills: Great run-down of the most common cliches in urban fantasy books, in particular those that plague female protagonists. Aspiring writers, remember: Ripley did not need a tramp-stamp to be strong. Or a three-way with a vampire and a werewolf to be sexy.
• And speaking of heroines – I so very much want this decal for my laptop but it’s been out of stock forever. Vinylville, don’t make me go all Disney Princess on your ass.
• Ditto:  I see the NYT has stolen my “Summer of Death” label. Good to know they are reading the Rib. RIP Patrick Swayze and Mary Travers.

Did you know?  Deadly diseases are beautiful when sculpted from glass.

SARS Corona Virus by Luke Jerram